Never Enough

When Tarot cards are not enough,
Even in it's most trusted and fulfilling Divination,
When Trust is not enough,
The doubt of a caved in crushing,
Seems to encompass all in its horror and suffocation,
I do not want to exist in that hole again,
Do not want to survive that heart break,
And wish not to survive either,
The mediocrity,
Of abandoning this...
It seems perfect,
It seems fulfilled,
But it also seems strained,
In confusion,
Reckless in its own dedication to the Unknown,
The Truly Unknown.

I want to announce, shout out,
Be frank, be open, be honest,
But with fear for being inappropriate,
And why?
Secret.
Fulfilled failing,
Suffocation of the ones we love,
Forcing them away,
Love not as deep as my own,
Always the case!
But is it not better than the last by far?
Is it enough?
Why even question, is it enough?
Why not?
Why so confused and in upheaval when,
Strength is so clearly upon you?
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know!!
A wise person came loud unto the Ages,
Hear me roar,
Hear me seethe,
Love manifest,
Hear me, hear me!
Hear me what? Fear?
Do not fear me,
For I am afraid,
Though this makes me weak
And insufferable,
And like Chronozon,
Confused,
Belittled,
I have Strength but no self-control,
I crave family,
Extension,
Magick,
Fucking,
Passion,
Always,
And I dwell on losing these things,
Moreover, on never experiencing them, at all.